Friday, November 7, 2008
Desperate Housewife
I need help. Seriously. So, this is a shout out to all you mom's who stay home with your kids.
I am so bored.
First of all, I just moved here two months ago and have approximately two friends. Two busy friends, I might add. So, Noah and I aren't exactly going to any playgroups.
Secondly, I have the house cleaned and organized by 10:00 am. This leaves me with about 7 hours until Jared comes home from work. So I...
-play with Noah
-read books
-blog stalk
-watch Judge Judy, Judge Joe Brown, Judge Penny, Judge David, & Judge Jeanine (I know, super lame, you said it. We don't have cable).
-write in my journal
-play with Noah more
-study different topics
-go for a walk
-go for another walk
-workout videos
(by the way, did I mention we only have one car and Jared takes it to work)
-take a nap
-make homemade meals
-talk to myself
-talk to Noah
-repeat
That pretty much wraps it up.
Now, if I were a person like my mother, I would be fine with doing all these things and would probably love my life. She's the person that went to college for child development and doesn't mind being by herself for hours on end. Anyone that knows me knows that THIS IS NOT ME AT ALLLLLLLLLLLLLL!!!!!!!!!!!
So, I could def. use some suggestions. Keep in mind that we have:
1. no money
2. no vehicle to use during the day
3. no friends
I can't wait to hear any advice you might have. I don't have much to work with here.
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13 comments:
I hear you. It seems like I am always the new girl without friends! The infant stage is a little harder for this reason- they only play so much. Part of being a mom, that I never realized before, is being an entertainer. Sometimes I think that is the most exhausting part of motherhood. However, I promise you'll get the hang of it- it just take some getting used to. Here are some suggestions: Keep an on-going 'to-do' list. I have this on my white board and I have it divided between 'Chores' 'Craft Projects' 'Other'. That way when I have something pop in my head (i.e. I would love to make a receiving blanket or try new chocolate covered pretzel recipe) I put it on my to do list. Then when I am getting bored I check my list. My Chores has things like 'clean faucets, dust, clean under beds, sort out-grown clothes' the type of chores that you norally don't do everyday! And 'Other' is mostly things for church or vinyl;visiting teaching, study sunday school lesson, write a thank you note to..., call and check on..., finish Christmas gift list for family, ect! wow! that was a lot :). Anyway, this really helps me to keep busy. Another huge help is when I take the time to actually schedule those things into my calendar...I love being able to cross off my list. Also, make sure to schedule something that is just for you in at least once a week (paint toe nails, try a new hair do, make a craft, take a nap). I hope this helps. I promise as Noah gets bigger and more babies come the busier it gets so try to enjoy the peaceful moments of the day:). If I know you at all, you are probably more lonely than anything. I only know that because I am the exact same way- and it is so easy to feel lonely when you move! So maybe we should just call eachother, eat chocolate and the world would be a better place. Love you! Wow! that was one long comment!
I agree with Misti! Moving is SO hard and having some friends is needed badly! It is lonely, and that is hard. I LOVE lists too-I can make lists that never end!(which isnt always a good thing) Do you like to scrapbook or make crafts? That's one thing I never caught up enough with Kade before I had Maggie, now I am swamped. I would like to learn how to sew-that's something on my to-do list. Then I will be able to make blankets and clothes and all sorts of fun things for my fam. It is true-they are pretty easy to entertain when young, but you will get more and more busy the older Noah gets. I had the problem of no car for a while because Bret took it to school. Then he figured out the bus system here and it has worked out wonderfully. It might not be a possibility or work for your husband, or your area, or even you-I don't know. But that way I am able to go to play groups. I talk to my mom a lot. We bought a webcam (off of Amazon-which shipping was free because it was $25) so they could see each other and that has been quite fun. I also like to try new recipes, so I spend a little while searching books or food network for one. Sorry if I'm not helpful! I just rambled a lot!
Courtney- I can see myself in the same situation and going as crazy as you. It funny because when we are busy and single we dream for the days we can "just stay home and be a mom"... but really that's not an easier! Here are my ideas: learn to sew, scrapbook (search ikeaa godess and google and a awesome digital scrapbooking blog will come up with nothing but free stuff... so it won't cost you a thing!), start a book club with some people in your ward, start training for your next half marathon.. jogging stroller?, I liked the webcam idea so you can have more fun talking with friend and family, handmake christmas presents and cards for this holiday season, crochet, family history...
I don't know. Coming up with things was harder than I thought! If lived by you... i would come and visit you all the time! I hope your doing good and things get easier for ya! Maybe you can start a masters program online? If money is tight, maybe just take one class at a time?
Courtney...you make me laugh and i feel ya. I am also the type of person that need people around. I always tell Jed this but he is the opposite. I tell him, "I grew up with six siblings I was NEVER alone and I liked it that way!" I hate being alone. Let's see what do i do with my day...I do work in the morning time for three and a half hours, which is hard because i don't like to leave her but it makes me appreciate that time that i do have with her for the rest of the day. I know working part or full time isn't for everyone but it is something that has worked for me personally. When Macie and I are together I guess you can say we just hang out sleep, eat, play, laugh, talk on the phone, sleep, eat, play, etc... I'm sure i do all of the same things you do only i am not so great with the house work part. To bad we don't live in the same place...then we could have some for sure play dates! hey could you take Jared to work like once or twice a week so that you could be free to go where you wanted a couple days a week? Sorry i don't have the best tips because i am in the same spot as you.
I'll come hang out with you! I get bored too!!
Hahaha, this is the reason I am not looking forward to being a mom! I am already so ADD, could you imagine??! I have an idea, though, I'll send you my wedding thank you notes and the list of who wrote them, and you can write them for me! Ugh, I HATe writing thank yous soooo much!! You warned me, and you were RIGHT!!!
With all that working out, the baby weight will fall off in no time! I did that staying home with Ella - but I took up running - which I'd never liked before. And now I LOVE IT! I am looking forward (patiently) to after this second baby's birth because I want to start running again!
I think the hardest thing is finding friends in the same life cycle (Mom to little babies, or little kids) as you that are as willing to be your friend as you are to them. I don't want to scare you, but it wasn't until just recently that I found friends I hang out with on a regular basis. We didn't have another car for a while, so they drove to my house and we went on a walk there. Afterwards, I hosted the playdate at my house with snacks and all to make up for driving to my house. Now that we have another car, my friends still come to my house to go on walks. It's tons of fun!
I was so bored staying at home with Ella after about 2 days. I am not the kind of person either that can stay at home with nothing in particular to do. Luckily, as kids get older and into things, they have much bigger messes and you'll have plenty to clean up ;).
There are so many options that you could choose from to occupy your time. I just recently took up sewing. And read the whole Twilight series - twice. And the Host. I didn't spend a dime on the books because I knew enough people who owned them. I just borrowed them.
I made pumpkin pie from scratch (like from an actual pumpkin and homemade pie crusts) for the first time in my life. My goal is to no go to Wal-Mart (because we're poor too) so I am trying to come up with recipes from food we've got in storage. They're lots to do. I make a mess cleaning, so then it takes me a while to clean it up and my day becomes busy.
I wish you lived closer. You could come out and go walking with us and join our playgroup! Good luck. Being a SAHM is one of the most difficult things I've done. But it is the most rewarding thing I've ever done.
It's hard for me to add any additional comments from what's been said. Lots of good suggestions for you to try. And yes, you and I are totally different. I don't mind staying at home but I always had crafts and sewing. Remember I sewed all my own maternity clothes? I don't know if sewing if for you but you could try again. Oh wait, no sewing machine and I think you were challenged by sewing on a button. Hey I paid Kallie for doing my scrapbooking - should I send it all to you and you can finish it for me. Creative juices just don't flow in this house.
The bigger Noah gets the more fun you'll have with him and don't be afraid to have some alone time. A great time to think and reflect.
Courtney Courtney!!! Take Jared to work and come over.... I would but I watch 4 kids a day!! You make me so sad!!! You can call me throughout the day! On the 22nd were going scrap booking so put that on your calendar. You could watch a kid and that will keep you so busy!!! You can call me anytime of the day and you won't bother me I promise!!
Cort, It kind of reminds me of those feelings I had when my mission companion was sick with salmonella poisoning (from eating cake batter) and I had to stay in the piso for like 4 days....but it felt like eternity!!! Well since I don't have any advice as a mom, I could give you some advice as a friend. I know how great you are at journal writing and hopefully you have kept that up. If not, try it again, writing down the things that have helped you cope being a mom so far. What your thoughts were before and after becoming pregnant, going into labor and being a mom...and then explain how you perceive them now. Write down the things Noah and Jared do that make your heart melt or smile throughout the day. Think about "Pan Dia" and make some homemade things for your neighbors or people who may need a little pick me up. You will feel a lot better as well. I LOVE to cook now, and a lot of that love comes from you...so keep the legend going and bake away hermana! You are one great mom for sure, and I hope you will take it a day at time, because life just goes too darn fast. Love you!
Oh man, love! No advice here, just an admission of guilt for complaining about my "housewife" status when you deserve the title a lot more than I! Too funny that we wrote about it at the same time, though. I MISS YOU, girl!
this is Christine's sister Holly, I met you right before you moved from Provo. I have a 2 year old and just moved cities and I am having a hard time finding things to do, so I can't even imagine. But, could you get a bus pass? Get online and find out if you have any indoor pools(rec centers) close by. Babies love to play in the water, even at a young age, I take my girl every week. And, try to enjoy it, the older they get the more that you really have to entertain them. Which means until 9 pm for me most nights, my husband works and is in school at night until 11 pm, so I hear ya sister. One more thing, get online at babycenter.com and get into your babies birth group with other moms that had babies in your same month, you might even meet some around you, I lived for that the first year of my girls life. Good luck!
court--I know you want to be busy....that time will come. the advice I'd like to give you is just enjoy every second. I know you hear that all the time--but really it goes so fast. I remember those days with Jonah--my house was perfect, I made perfect meals--I had time to do everything I wanted, and I even got bored! and now life is crazy!! we are so busy and sometimes I wish we could just stop....just for a little bit.
so that's my two cents:)
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